Our lovely ladies are four months today, or 1/3 of a year. They love their sit me up chairs, longer tummy time sessions, smiling, their unicorn mobile and catching glimpses of the TV or my phone.

Caelyn is turning into a sweet, gentle lady and has had a very sensitive soul. She gets more easily upset, but will melt into you when you hold her and she is my little koala. She loves her octopus and will move around the legs and crinkle the red part around its face. She can grab her toes, almost roll from back to front, turns in circles during tummy time and will bat at and grab toys and lips. She loves the sit me up toys and that is one of her most content places.

Kira is a very free spirit and is a little more independent. She is a little better at sitting up and only needs to hold something stable with one of her hands. She likes being in the swing and catching a bird we have dangling within her reach. She is very content most of the time and will easily switch from one thumb to the other to suck on. She recently will push off her legs to lift her bottom in the air and this makes sitting up time or diaper changes fun. She LOVES standing and while we don’t do it often, she has good control of her legs and wants to put weight on them to see everything.

Both girls love to smile and laugh and are currently sleeping until about 5am and go 12 hours overnight without fussing to eat. They are in sleep snacks and are not using swaddles at all and are pretty good at self soothing with a pacifier, fist or thumb. They love to put themselves next to each other and since I lay them sideways in the crib now, that means them backing up to touch the back of their heads to each other. We finally are able to put some bows on without me sewing them smaller and are in the wider spectrum of 0-3 or 3 month clothes.

We also put them in their big stroller seat for the first time today at a farmers market and they were adorable. They also recently tried their first frozen teether and loved biting on it. We don’t see any teeth yet. But Kira is blowing spit bubbles bigger than her mouth and Caelyn drips spit during tummy time, so it may be coming soon.

Their Grandma Kay is here and they love getting to spend time playing and cuddling with her. She is even learning how to change cloth diapers!

As I sit in the dark feeding my babies, I so often stare at them with amazement for so many reasons. How I have sustained them for the past three months just from myself, as I did while I carried them inside me. How peaceful they look as they cuddle against me and how they must feel getting that need met and being “understood” without using words. How they are little, but they are also big, with their baby feet now hanging off the nursing pillow that once contained both of their whole bodies and blankets. Today, I am thinking about how many little moments we have and am grateful that I am able to take the time to catch some of them.

Kira smiles at me when I tickle her feet in the bath. Caelyn reaches out to touch my face when I kiss her hand. They sneak hand holding when they are eating and find them when they are sleeping. Not too long ago, I held both of them against my chest and slept in the recliner because they were inconsolable about all the new outside changes and now they sleep multiple hours in a crib.

They cry. They get up multiple times a night fussing, even if they aren’t hungry. They cry when they want me to hold them. But they are brand new and I tell myself and them every day that I understand everything is new and they are learning and doing their best every day. I call them my “level 1 Kira and Caelyn” because this is just the beginning and while they will eventually be level 18 and leaving on their own, they are my brand new ones and soon they won’t be. Soon they will crawl and laugh and speak and run and dress themselves and sleep through the night. But for now, I will feed them in the dark and watch them.

Today we have three month beauties. Both girls are getting good at tummy time and get frustrated when they can’t roll over fast enough. We have our weight check next week for this month and we are still only breastfeeding. Weve had a few nights (gasp) that they have not had their middle of the night feed. They woke up a little restless, so I still was awake, but I’m hoping this is the start of a pattern and not a fluke or a bad thing.

Kira and Caelyn both love momma and cry when someone new holds them. Kira has been a little sad for the past few days and has been a little clingier, so I think she is doing some big growing. Kira also sucks her thumb, which I personally love for self soothing. Caelyn is figuring out her own routine to soothe herself and is starting to get into some strange looking sleeping configurations and getting close to rolling from back to front in her crib.

We are in a good routine now and have been getting out of the house as well. I go back to work in a few weeks and am looking for nannies. They both nap very well for their age and in the past week, have gradually been building up to drop their last evening nap and have been content to chill with mom and dad until bath these past few days. Caelyn is quieter with her sounds, but Kira talks up a storm and made the “ma” sound today. Caelyn is such a little cutie pie and will pose like an ann ghedes baby.

I am excited and anxious for all our recent changes and hope we adjust soon! One good thing is that the girls are able to wear 0-3 month and shrunk 3 month clothes, so they are finally getting bigger!

The girls are officially 12 weeks old, which marks the end of the “fourth trimester”, which people mark as the final adjustment of baby outside of the womb and for the woman to heal and adjust to life with a baby. We had a rough day today with feeding and crankiness, but that hasn’t happened in a while and I think they are heading into their next big development phase.

We have continued to be able to exclusively nurse or give pumped milk and it has settled into our normal and isnt overwhelming or stressful anymore. The girls both babble, Kira more than Caelyn though. Caelyn LOVES faces and has made great headway with tummy time. surpassing Kira a little bit with neck strength from her stomach. Kira rolls over all the time now and they are both becoming more independent if left “on their own” during tummy time, awake in their crib, etc. They are both officially out of preemie and some newborn, since they also fit into the one size cloth diapers. They can wear some shrunk 0-3 and three month sleepers and onsies, although they are very large still. We have been out of the house frequently and the girls are learning to travel much better and easier.

I am returning to work July 9th, so I have less than a month before I have to leave my babies. I still haven’t found their care situation. since there isn’t much to choose from, but I am staying hopeful. Chris is also continuing to adjust and will do bath time, feed bottles and watch babies for me to leave the house or do school, which he did today. We are also basically settled in our home and I am finally getting things hung on the walls, which is the longest it has ever taken after a move.

I cannot wait to see what happens these next few months as Caelyn and Kira continue to grow and learn, as well as us all adjusting to me working outside of the home.